The thing about growth is, you have to first plant a seed….and then you have to wait.
It can be a discouraging process, at times, waiting for growth because it’s in the waiting, that DOUBT can take root. What am I doing? Why am I even bothering? What is the point? I’m never going to get there. I try to push away these thoughts but I’m not going to lie – they are still there – and I’m guessing that I’m not the only one who has struggled or is currently struggling with doubt.
Last week I saw this quote and I’ve been looking at it daily. Ok, I’ve been looking at it numerous times a day if I’m being honest because I need to be reminded constantly, not to dig up in doubt, what I’ve planted in faith.
The thing about growth is, that you always plant the seed from a place of faith. You are hopeful, excited even, for the new direction that you are taking. You plant the seed; you water it daily; then you wait. And then you wait some more. And then you watch the ground anxiously, waiting – perhaps somewhat impatiently if you are like me – some more. You wait for the first signs of life to burst forth from beneath the ground to show you that the seed you planted, is in fact growing. Then, you come to a sobering realization: when and how the growth happens is completely out of your control. All you can do is have the courage to plant the seed and then you have to water it and nurture it and invest in it but after that, all you can do is wait. It’s in the waiting, that doubt starts to spring forth, threatening all that you’ve worked so hard for and all that you’ve hoped for.
DOUBT. You start to question why you don’t see the growth yet. You start to question why you even bothered planting the seed. You start to think about giving up. You start to think about digging up what you planted in faith. It’s in the doubt, that you risk losing everything you’ve worked for.
When I was in Charleston, I sat beneath the arms of the 500 year angel tree. I marveled at it’s beauty, it’s strength, it’s magnificence; but more than anything, I marveled at it’s growth. The angel tree now spans over 17,200 square feet and its longest branch distance is 187 ft. Now that kind of growth…do you think it happened over night? No it didn’t. What a shame if, when that angel tree was but a seed in the ground, someone gave up on it. What if, they would have let doubt take root instead? What if they would have lost faith and dug up the little seed, before it was given time to grow? If they would have let doubt win, this magnificent tree would not be standing.
The point is. You have to allow time for growth, and that means, not digging up in doubt what you planted in faith. You can’t let doubt win. You can’t quit just because you don’t see the growth yet. You have to trust that the roots are growing deep below the surface. They are growing strong so that they can support the tree once it sprouts up above the ground. You have to trust, that even though you can’t see it, good things are happening. You can’t let doubt win. Like the quote above says: DOUBT KILLS MORE DREAMS THAN FAILURE EVER WILL. Doubt will prevent you from growing, and reaching your potential before failure ever will, and do you want to know why? Because doubt will cause you to dig up what you planted in faith.
I’m saying YOU but really I’m talking to myself when I write this just so you know. Six months ago, or perhaps even a year ago if I’m being honest with myself, I felt a stirring. I knew it was time to step away from the old and to walk toward the new. I decided it was time to plant a seed. I decided to fire up my blog and start writing again, which I love more than anything. I decided to finish the book that I had been secretly writing, and send out query letters to search for an agent to represent me. I decided to combine all of our loves – building, flipping, home design and photography – into one business. I decided to make a big investment and redo my website. I decided to step away from what was comfortable and plant a seed. I decided to start a growth journey.
At times, I feel discouraged and I struggle with doubt. I question why I didn’t just stick with photography only and build that business. I question if I will ever make the money back that I sunk into building a new website (just keeping it real). I question if I will find someone to represent me and help me publish my book. I question if this will all be worth it, or if I’ve made a huge mistake. But honestly, even in spite of the doubt, deep down inside I feel something growing. It’s beneath the surface, but it’s there. I feel something, perhaps it’s growth beginning to take root deep beneath the surface. I feel like I’m on this roller coaster ride of euphoric highs where I feel like I could conquer the world and crashing lows where I struggle with DOUBT.
So when I’m struggling with doubt I’m trying to remember this – DON’T DIG UP IN DOUBT WHAT YOU PLANTED IN FAITH. Maybe one day my little seed will grow into the angel tree. Maybe it won’t. But regardless of what happens, I know that I will never regret having the courage to get started. I know that I will never regret having the courage to plant a seed.
I don’t know about you but I would rather have the courage to start – to plant a seed – and perhaps experience unimaginable growth, than to never even plant a seed and not even have the chance to grow. You don’t have to be great to get started, you guys, but you do have to get started to be great. You do have to plant a seed if you want to grow.
You guys maybe I’m not the only one struggling with doubt. So I’ll say to you what I’m saying to myself: DON’T DIG UP IN DOUBT WHAT YOU PLANTED IN FAITH. Don’t let doubt win. Maybe one day your little seed will be the angel tree.
And what a beautiful thing that would be.
